Carol Adamski
  • Home
  • Coaching
    • Life Coaching
    • Professional Coaching
    • Ace The Interview. Get The Offer
    • Coaching for Effective Presentations
    • Living in Gratitude
    • Women's Study
  • About
  • Client Testimonials
  • Blog
  • Contact/Links
  • Political Candidate Consultant

What Happens When You Stop Taking Things Personally

3/19/2016

0 Comments

 
There is a huge amount of freedom that comes to you when you take nothing personally." ~Don Miguel Ruiz

Most of us have taken something someone else has said personally. If someone says something negative, we may get angry or upset. And when we continually rely on others saying positive things to make us feel good, we allow them to determine our self worth and confidence. Both negatively affect our self-esteem, our relationship with ourself and with others.
When we stop taking things personally, we realize that what other people say and do is not about us at all; it's about them.

According to Don Miguel Ruiz, author of the Four Agreements, nothing others do is because of us. Their words and actions are a projection of their own reality, their own feelings, beliefs and issues. When we become immune to the opinions and actions of others, be they negative or positive, we are no longer allowing ourselves to be victims.


Three incredible things occur when we refuse to take things to heart.

1.We become the ruler of our own emotions and get clear direction for our life. When we take the things other people say personally, both negative and positive, we are in effect handing over control of our emotions and our life to someone else.  But when we choose to no longer take things personally, we are then in charge of our emotions and our actions. What other people think or expect of us no longer has an impact. We follow our heart, believe in ourselves and do what is best for us and our lives without being influenced by outside pressures.
Picture
2. We discover who we are, and what we are about. When we don't take other people's opinions, actions and words  personally, we begin to learn what is important to us, what we want to do, what makes us happy and unhappy. We develop an independent moral compass and vision for your life, and our decisions become more vivid and have more certainty. We live more boldly, making choices that work for us and our personal value system, all with much less regret and second-guessing.

3. You connect more deeply with others. When we practice understanding that nothing anyone else says or does is actually about us, we begin to have compassion for the wounds that those who say or do unkind things toward are experiencing. We are more able to connect with people from a place of mutual love, respect and a commitment to engaging in relationships that reflect the friend, partner, family member and professional we want to be in this life rather than coming from a place of quid pro quo, caretaking, obligation and name-calling. Our relationships will be built on that foundation are deep, strong and healthy.

Taking things personally is limiting. It gradually erodes our clarity and boldness by forcing our life into something that no one else will find objectionable. Release the tendency to take things personally. Doing so is transformative, putting us back on the throne of our emotions and our actions.
0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    Carol Adamski

    Carol Adamski, M.A., has led various workshops—nationally and internationally—on leadership, personal empowerment, communications, and relationships. For 15 years as a coach, she has demonstrated strength and compassion, with the ability to listen deeply and ask just the right questions.

    Archives

    April 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016

    Categories

    All
    Career Advice
    Coaching
    Life Tips
    Research Studies
    Time Management

    RSS Feed

Subscribe: Receive a FREE guide ~ 
5 Key Communication Mistakes & How To Correct Them
as well as newsletters with event updates, inspiring and practical information.
We respect your privacy and will not share your information. 


Powered by Create your own unique website with customizable templates.

BACK TO TOP

Contact Carol Adamski - 408 761-4446

Plain&Simple Web Design
Google analytics